March 28, 2010

Blinded


I stop with a halt.
It’s hard to deal with gazillion thoughts
Running through my head
But,
My heart inevitably keeps on pondering.
The details remain ruined
I was anxious
I wanted it to end.
I briskly let my lid close
But, across the darkly dim room
I could still see your ashen face
I struggle to keep my eyes closed
Steady as I wanted to be
Yet, I could still see you
I could still hear the thumping of your heart.
My own tried to mimic the sound
My lashes moist with tears,
I just couldn’t.
It’s far harder than I ever imagined.
My soul drank with dizziness,
Not aware of you could hands
Against my bare nakedness
My eyes bolt open
But, it didn’t take long.
I blink, and then you’re gone.
I embraced myself
I let the chill of loneliness
Cut my soul to pieces.
It’s blurry. I wasn’t able to see clearly ahead.
It’s hard to look for the light
when I don’t have you in my heart.


"Lahat ng bilihin nagmamahalan na...tayong dalawa nalang ang hindi..."

March 26, 2010

That Guy

 
Delinquent and dumb ass,
That’s all you seemed to me.
Rumored much and playboy,
Easy-going-happy-lucky type of guy,
Chauvinistic and care the less,
Thinking I know you that well.
Talking about biased based gossips,
I couldn’t care that much.
Wasn’t it all until that day?

I’ve known you since then,
From that day onwards
I couldn’t complain to fate, could I?
Nevertheless, I am happy our world intertwined.
Behind all those gossip
I have seen the honest real you.
The guy who hates peanuts,
Yet love strawberry jams.
The guy who loves techno music,
The guy who stands up for what he believes in,
The guy who’s so much a gentleman that he got confused for being a playboy,
The guy who takes things lightly,
 The guy who always listens.
Moreover,
You are that guy I had fallen in love with,
Right at that moment…
That day I found you crying and your heart bleeding right in the middle of nowhere.



"Lahat ng bilihin nagmamahalan na...tayong dalawa nalang ang hindi..."

March 9, 2010

Bestfriend

Minamahal kong kaibigan,

Nagdadalawang isip ako kung dapat ko bang sabihin sayo ang bagay na ito. Nahihiya. Kinakabahan. Natatakot. Samot saring emosyon ang nadarama ko habang sinusulat ang liham na ito. Pero you're my bestfriend na eversince the world begun. So, I decided na i-share na rin.

Meron akong matagal ng minamahal. Pasensya na kung itinago ko sa iyo ha at least ngayon ini-open ko na. Yun nga, I started to like him the first time na nakita ko siya. Love at first sight ba tawag doon? Ewan ko. Basta ang alam ko I experience tachycardia, dyspnea, palpitation, and flushing tuwing nandiyan siya sa tabi tabi. Para siyang signs and symptoms ng isang sakit na mahirap iwasan. Pero I tried pa rin na kalimutan 'tong feelings na ito kahit mahirap... still... mahal ko pa rin siya. Isang disease process ang love ko sa kanya na nagsimula sa eyes na na-perceive ng aking hypothalamus sending signals to my nerves papuntang heart diretsong lungs at dumaloy sa aking sistema.

Gusto mo sigurong itanong sa akin kung bakit hindi ko i-pursue ang love sa taong iyon. Bakit nga ba hindi? Pwedeng pwede kong sabihin sa na I'm deeply ill in love with him kaya lang... kaya lang hindi ko kaya. Duwag? No, I'm not. Alam mo ba kung bakit hindi ko kaya? Sige, itanong mo. Kasi pagmamay-ari na siya ng iba. Yes, friend. May mahal na siyang iba. Pwede ko siyang agawin kung gusto ko pero di ko keri. Di ko kayang agawin siya sa taong mahal niya.

I bet gusto mo akong sermunan ngayon at sabihing "You're so tanga!" Better look for another medicine boylet. Na-try ko na rin yan. Di pa rin tumalab. Up to now I'm still in love with him.

Naglalaro siguro sa utak mo ang question na "Sino ba ang taong iyon?" Gusto mo ba talagang malaman? Sige sasabihin ko but promise me one thing... you're still my bestfriend despite of what you'll know, okey?

Friend
I'm sorry but...
I'm inlove with you----------you're boyfriend.

I'm sorry talaga!

Love, 
You're bestfriend

P.S. Promise I'll never try to snatch him away from you!
P.P.S. Pero if you want you can share him with... "what are friends are for?"
P.P.P.S. Or better yet, bigay mo na lang siya sa akin.

"Lahat ng bilihin nagmamahalan na...tayong dalawa nalang ang hindi..."