It's all about Niki

I. A note from Niki

This morning I was so suprised to see a note lying in my desk from Niki. I was shocked to know that she already knew how to write. Furthermore, I'm delighted that she is active in her class. The note was about the activity her mentor had given to them, writing a biography.

Here how it goes:

An Essay about Me

My name is Niki-pot. I am 2 2/3 years old. I am a beagle. I live in a house. I also have a condo. They put the TV on my penthouse so I sleep in the groundfloor.

I want to give a shout to POOH, "you are still my bestfriend---- wherever you are". I'd like to bark hi to Che-che, Jobaks, Happy Boogie, Miaka, and my sister Ashley. I like chocolate, mentos spearmint, and...ATAY.

They say I'm fat, but I don't care. I don't believe them. I know I'm cute no need to repeat it over and over. I am not insecure unlike that Miaka...but they always say I'm cute.

I like walking walking everymorning and kamot kamot always. I also like sleeping in front of the electricfan or siksik in pillows. I also like eating turbo chicken if ATAY is not available or if turbo chicken is not availabale I like KFC chicken also...It's paw liking kikin' good.

That's all...Laterz!





My jaw drop after reading the note. Surely someone is feeding me a joke. Imagine a dog writing...my dog writing?  What more can be worst?

ECHOLAI date

Sa mga gustong kiligin...watch the ECHOLAI date:
















Credits to: WeLuvBabyDengue 


"Pusong ligaw" Lyrics
Sang by: Jericho Rosales

Di kita malimutan sa mga gabing nagdaan
ikaw ang pangarap, nais kong makamtan
sa buhay ko ay ikaw ang kahulugan
pag-ibig ko'y walang kamatayan
ako'y umaasang muli kang mahagkan

Ikaw pa rin ang hanap nang Pusong Ligaw
ikaw ang patutunguhan at pupuntahan
pag-ibig mo ang hanap nang Pusong Ligaw
mula noon, bukas at kailanman

Ikaw at akoy pinagsamang muli
ikaw ang nais sa gabing sumasalamin
patuloy kong at panalangin
kung wala ka'y kulang mga bituin
umaasa akong babalik ang ligaya sa'king gabi
hanggang sa muling pagkikita
sasabihing MAHAL KITA

Ikaw pa rin ang hanap nang Pusong Ligaw
ikaw ang patutunguhan at pupuntahan
pag-ibig mo ang hanap nang Pusong Ligaw
mula noon, bukas at kailanman
mula noon, bukas at kailanman
mula noon, bukas at kailanman

Si Ama at Ina

Dalawang taon pa lang ako ng maghiwalay ang mga magulang ko. Isang batang musmos na walang kaalam-alam sa mundo. hindi ko alam kung bakit sila nagdesisyong maghiwalay. Ni hindi ko na nga matandaan ang mukha ni ama. Lahat ng larawan na tanging magpapaalala sa akin kung sino siya sa buhay ko ay sinunog ni ina. Gusto kong magalit kay ina noon, masyado siyang makasarili ni hindi na niya inisip ang anak niya, ako.

Ano pang magagawa ko? Wala na. Noong nakaraang taon nakarating sa akin ang isang balitang hindi ko inaasahan. Isang taon na raw na patay si ama. Wala akong ibang nagawa kung hindi ang humagulgol. Sa pagitan ng impit na iyak ay napansin ko si ina...naroon sa isang sulok at tumatangis. Paulit-ulit ang mga tanong na nanunulas sa kanyang mga labi.

"Bakit mo ako iniwan mahal ko?"

Mga katagang dumurog ng galit na tinanim ko sa puso ko. Mahal niya pa rin si ama...marahil nga ay masyado lamang siyang nasaktan noon.

Nilapitan ko siya at niyakap. Sa paghalik ko sa kanyang noo ay kasabay ang usal ng patawad...

21 things Girls don't realize?

Girls, I don't know if you would agree on this post but I'll still post it anyway...

1) Guys may be flirting around all day, but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about....
.
2) Guys are more emotional than you think, if they loved you at one point, it'll take them a lot longer then you think to let you go, and it hurts every second that they try.
.
3) Guys go crazy over a girl's smile(:
.
4) A guy who likes you wants to be the only guy you talk to.
.
5) Giving a guy a hanging message like "You know what?..uh...nevermind.." would make him jump to a conclusion that is far from what you are thinking. And he'll assume he did something wrong and he'll obsess about it trying to figure it out.
.
6) If a guy tells you about his problems, he just needs someone to listen to him. You don't need to give advice.
.
7) A usual act that proves that the guy likes you is when he teases you.
.- sorry girls but I totally agree with this. It's their defense mechanism maybe because they don't want to admit what they are feeling for a girl.

8) GUYS LOVE YOU MORE THAN YOU LOVE THEM!!!
.
9) Guys use words like hot or cute to describe girls. They rarely use beautiful or gorgeous. If a guy uses that, he loves you or likes you a whole heck of a lot.
.
10)If the guy does something stupid in front of the girl, he will think about it for the next couple days or until the next time he spends time with the girl.
.
11)If a guy looks unusually calm and laid back, he's probably faking it and he is really thinking about something
.
12) When a guy says he is going crazy about the girl, he really is...Guys rarely say that
.
13)When a guy asks you to leave him alone, he's just actually saying, "Please come and listen to me"
.
14)If a guy starts to talk seriously, listen to him. It doesn't happen that often, so when it does, you know something's up.
.
15) When a guy looks at you for longer than a second, he's definitely thinking
something.
.
16) Guys really think that girls are strange and have unpredictable decisions and are MAD confusing but somehow are drawn even more to them
.
17)A guy would give the world to be able to read a girl's mind for a day.
.
18)No guy can handle all his problems on his own.
He's just too stubborn to admit it
.
19)NOT ALL GUYS ARE RUDE!!!
Just because ONE is RUDE doesnt mean he represents ALL of them
.
20)WHEN A GUY SACRIFICES HIS SLEEP AND HEALTH JUST TO TALK TO YOU, HE REALLY LIKES YOU AND WANTS TO BE WITH YOU AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE
.
21)Even if you dump a guy months ago and he loved you he probably still does and if he had one wish it would be you to come back into his life

This Christmas...shop and share!

I just wanna share something that's worth being read and heard across the World. As a Filipino citizen I felt compelled to give you bits of info I stumbled upon surfing the net. I wanted to share to you the SHOP and SHARE project of two Filipino celebs, Ms. Angel Locsin and Ms. Anne Curtis. You can find there great items owned by other celebs that can be gift to loveones this Christmas season. Feel free to stop by the site and help million Filipinos who have suffered from the typhoons that pass through our beloved country this year.

We are celebrities who have been exceptionally blessed by your love and
support. We witnessed for ourselves the devastation, brought about by
"Ondoy" and "Pepeng". We felt compelled to share not just our voices
and our time, but from our own closets. These items have meaning in our
lives and now they'll become even more mea...ningful because they'll help
rebuild broken homes and broken dreams.  

Because of you we are where we are.
And now with you, together, we can help our fellow Filipinos move
forward, even just one step at a time. Maraming salamat sa pagbibigay
nyo ng pansin sa adhikain namin. We love Philippines! We love you :)
 

- Ms. Kris Aquino

www.shopandshare.ph

I Hold the Memories in my Dreams

NOON lagi akong nangangarap…pangarap na lagi namang bigo. Isang trying hard to be a writer at palagay ko forever ng trying hard…frustrated…and never na magiging the best.

That was 5 years ago…noon, oo noon…Pero ngayong it seems like I have everything I wish I could have. I’m now a successful writer-slash-novelist-or-w

hatever. Yung tipong bestseller ang mga obra. Yet there is always emptiness.

Laging nandoon…nakakabit sa alaala, bawat paghinga at pagtibok ng puso ko ang isang lihim na itinago ko para sa isang taong nagpabago ng buhay ko…

“SIR?” sabik kong hinintay ang reaksyon ng editor ng Publishing House kung saan ako nagtatrabaho.

Napapalatak ito, “wala ka pa ring improvement, hija. Sa grammar and spellings nag-improve ka pero sa paraan ng panunulat mo at sa flow ng istorya, wala…kulang. Hindi ko madama ang emosyong hinahanap ko. So, I guess ito na ang huling araw mo rito.”

My case is hopeless. Lahat ng Publishing House kung saan affiliated ako lagi akong tanggal all just because of that stupid emotion they say.

Frustrated writer…yeah that’s who I am. But then…siguro kailangan ko ng mag-iba ng landas.

WANTED ALL AROUND HOUSE MAID!

Nang mabasa ko ang karatulang iyon ay hindi na ako nag dalawang isip pa. Patulan na ang pwedeng patulan hindi naman pwedeng gutumin ko ang sarili ko ng dahil lang sa kahibangan ko sa pag-susulat.

I started to work for Dexter. Isang bugnutin, palasigaw at siya na yatang pinaka-aroganteng lalaki na nakilala ko. Oh but did I mention kung gaano kasimpatiko ang amo ko na iyon? Yun nga lang nakakasira ng kagandahang lalaki niya ang pagkakatali niya sa silyang de gulong bukod pa sa panget niyang ugali.

Ayon sa Lola nito na siyang tumanggap sa akin bilang katulong ng binata ay na-aksidente raw ito noong minsang mag-talo ito at ang ama. Dala ng kalasingan ay hindi nito namalayan ang pagsalubong dito ng isang van na nawalan ng preno. Nadaganan ang paa nito at nadamage ng husto. Pinayuhan siyang magpa-therapy ngunit dahil nga ayaw niya na siya ay kina-aawaan ay kinulong niya ang sarili sa sarili nitong mundo. Kahit anong pilit dito ng mga relatives nito ay nagbingi-bingihan lamang ito.

“CINDY!” malakas na twag nito mula sa master’s bedroom.

Ito na naman po tayo. Ano naman kaya ang reklamo nito ngayon?

“Sir?” lihim kong itinatago ang asar at disgusto sa aking tinig kaya halos pabulong na nang mag-salita ako.

“Ano ba itong niluto mo? Bakit walang lasa?” nakasimangot na tanong nito.

“Nilagang baka po ang tawag diyan, sir” sarkastiko kong sagot

“Alam ko…wag mo akong pilosopohin. Ang tanong ko bakit walang kalasa-lasa? Hindi ka ba tinuruan mag-luto ng masarap ng nanay mo?”

Ouch naman…hindi daw masarap ang luto ko? At dinamay pa talaga ang nanay ko. May araw din itong lalaking ito sa akin.

“Eh sir, gusto nyo po ng patis pampalasa?”

“ayoko ng Patis” Halos isang linya na lang ang kilay nito ng bulyawan niya ako

“Asin sir?” hindi pa rin tumitinag na tanong ko

“Never mind”

“Eh di wag na rin kaya kayong kumain” bubulong-bulong kong sagot habang nanatiling nakatayo sa pinto.

“ano kamo?” naka-angil niyang tanong sa akin

“A-ah ha...w-wala ho”

“Sige na ilabas mo na ‘yan wala na akong ganang kumain”

Hmp ang arte! Lagyan ko kaya ng sili sa susunod yung pagkain nito. Tignan ko lang kung sasabihin mo pang walang lasa ang luto ko.

Buwisit talaga. Wala na ba siyang alam gawin kung hindi ang mag-reklamo? Sa araw-araw na ginawa ng Diyos ay lagi na lang siyang naka-sigaw…naka-simangot.

Kailan kaya siya ngingiti man lang?

But Dexter is just so irresistible kahit pa bugnutin ito. I can’t help but fall in love with him whenever I look at those expressive eye sof him that seems to search one’s soul at napakatiim kung tumitig na parang gusto akong tunawin and those lips na parang…parang ang sarap halikan. Hay! Hindi talaga mahirap mahulog sa karisma niya.

At heto ako, lihim na umaasa sa pagtingin niya. Ngunit ang damdamin ko sa kanya ay itinago ko sa kasulok-sulukan ng puso ko at hindi hinayaang malaman ng kahit na sino…

KUNG nagawa ko lang sanang ipaalam ito sa kanya noon. Pero tapos na at kalian man ay hindi ko na pwedeng ulitin ang mga nangyari na.

“Ano ba bestfriend, maghapon ka na namang nakaharap diyan sa laptop mo. Pwede ba kahit ngayon lang lumabas ka.” Litanya ng best friend ko – si Ayah…na ang sabi niya ay nagmamalasakit lang daw sa akin.

“Alam mo dapat sayo mag-madre.”

“As usual narindi na naman po siya sa sermon ko. Pero sige na friend samahan mo naman ako tonight.”

“Hay ano pa nga bang magagawa ko eh kahit ano namang tanggi ko magungulet at mangungulet ka pa rin. If I know nag-away lang kayo ng boyfriend mo.” Wika ko na tinawanan lamg nito ng malakas.

Simula ng mawala siya sa akin ay isinubsob ko na ang ulo ko sa trabaho. Ayokong magkaroon ng puwang sa utak ko sa pag-iisip sa kanya. Masasaktan lang ako.

Ngunit hindi ko inaasahang ang nakaraan ay muling magbabalik sa alaala ko ngayong gabi.

Nanlalamig ang buo kong katawan sa kaba. My first instinct is to run and hide..away form him pero iba ang ibinubulong ng puso ko. Isa…dalawa…tatlo…kusang humakbang ang mga paa ko na animo may sariling pag-iisip.

“Hey friend, saan ka pupunta?” hindi ko pinanasin ang tanong niyang iyon. Nakatuon lamang ang atensyon ko sa iisang tao sa lugar na iyon na ngayon ay paalis na.

‘Sandali’ hiyaw ng utak ko

Kailangan ko siyang abutan. Ayoko ng sayangin ang panahon tulad ng limang taong nasayang na.

Ngayon muling nagtagpo ang aming landas gusto ko ng pakawalan ang lihim ko at ipagsigawang ‘Mahal ko siya’.

“Dexter!” halos kasabay ng pagpatak ng luha ko ang muling pagdaloy ng nakaraan sa aking alaala…

HINDI ko inaasahang mababago ko siya. Ang dating bugnutin ngayon ay mahinahon na. Ang dating palasigaw ngayon ay soft spoken na at ang dating laging nakasimangot ngayon ay nagagawa ng ngumiti at sumabay sa mga halakhak ko.

Isang malaking himala sabi nga nila.

Napilit ko siyang magpa-therapy. Ang dating inutil na nakatali sa silyang de gulong ay Malaya ng nakakalakad na muli ngayon.

Hindi rin maiwasang maging malapit kami sa isa’t isa. Hanggang naganap ang hindi inaasahang pangyayari sa pagitan naming dalawa. Isang gabing hiram para sa dalawang kaluluwang uhaw sa pagmamahal.

Alam kong mali ngunit may alam bang mali ang pusong umiibig?

Naganap man sa pagitan namin ang bagay na iyon ay hindi ko magawang sabihin sa kanya ang lihim ko.
Sa bawat araw ay naroon ang pangamba sa puso ko na pilit kong itinatago mula sa kanya. Sa kabila ng Lahat ng agam-agam ay naging mas makulay ang paligid ko sa bawat araw na magdaan. Kahit alam kong walang katiyakan ang damdamin niya para sa akin ay gusto kong sumugal kahit alam kong may posibilidad na matalo ako at masaktan.

Nabatid ng kanayang mga magulang ang tungkol sa namamagitang relasyon sa aming dalawa. Gaya ng dapat asahan ay tutol sila sa akin.

“Magkano ba ang kailangan mo babae?” wala sa bahay ng mga sandaling iyon si Dexter at alam kong sinadya nila iyon.

“Walang bayad ang pag-ibig ko Mr. Alonzo” matatag kong saad kahit nanlalambot na ang mga tuhod ko.

“At ang akala mo ba ay naniniwala kaming minamahal mo ang aking unico hijo? Hindi bagay ang isang tulad mo na tonta sa aking anak.”

“Sabihin mo kung magkano ang kailangan mo…isang milyon? dalawa? O tatlo?” wala akong makitang emosyong mula sa papa nito ng sabihin nito iyon.

“Umalis na lamang po kayo” mahinahon ko pa ring saad kahit na masakit ang bawat katagang binitawan nila laban sa pagkatao ko.

“Binabalaan kita babae layuan mo ang anak ko” ang matigas na pahayag ni Mrs. Alonzo bago tuluyang lumisan.

Nang makaalis sila ay saka ako umiyak.

Hindi, ipaglalaban ko ang pag-ibig ko kay Dexter, ngunit paano?

Ng gabing iyon ay muli kong ipinagkaloob ang buong puso’t kaluluwa ko kay Dexter. Bilang matamis na pabaon sa aking paglayo.

Paalam, Dexter…bulong ng puso ko bago ko tuluyang isara ang pinto.

Subalit hindi pa doon natapos Lahat ng sakit. Muli kaming nagtagpo upang lalo lamang akong saktan.

“Bakit Cindy…bakit? Bakit kailangan mong magpabayad sa kanila?” ang marahas na bintang nito sa akin.

“Wala akong alam sa sinasabi mo Dexter”

“Sinungaling! Aminin mo na ipinagpalit mo ako sa salaping ibinayad nila sa iyo. Isang milyon Cindy…yun lang ba ang halaga ko sayo?”

Hah! Ngayon alam ko na. Sa huling sandal kahit na ako na ang kusang lumayo ay siniraan pa rin nila ako sa mga mata ng anak nila.

“Oo tinanggap ko ang isang milyon at wala ka ng paki-alam doon.” Pag-amin ko sa kasalanang hindi ko naman ginawa.

Hindi ko alam kung bakit inako ko ang bagay na yun. Ang tanging nararamdaman ko lang ng mga sandaling iyon ay galit at pagka-suklam sa mga Alonzo. At si Dexter? Ganoon ba kababa ang pagkakakilala niya sa akin?

“Sayang Cindy…sayang” Nakita ko sa kanyang mga mata ang sakit. Katulad ng sakit na nararamdaman ko ng mga sandaling yaon.

Bakit? Mahal niya rin ba ako? Hindi! Imposible…kastigo ko sa sarili ko.
Kaya naman hinayaan ko lang siyang lumisan ng hindi itinatama ang pag-amin kong lalo lamang nagdagdag ng sakit sa puso ko.

Masakit…at Lahat ng sakit ay ibinuhos ko sa pag-susulat at sa wakas…hindi na ako isang trying hard. Kailangan ko lang palang masaktan. Ngunit sa bawat matagumpay na obra ay nakulong ang pagkatao ko na ngayong gabi ay palalayain ko na…

“DEXTER!”

“Cindy?”

Sinugod ko siya ng yakap at doon sa dibdib niya…pinalaya ko Lahat ng hinanakit at sama ng loob na dinala ko sa puso ko sa loob ng limang taon.

“Dexter, alam ng Diyos wala akong tinanggap na ano mang halaga sa mga magulang mo.” Lumuluha kong sabi sa kanya

“Shhh…alam ko”

“Alam mo?” natitigilang tanong ko sa kanya

“Oo inamin nila sa akin bago sila sabay na bawian ng buhay sa isang aksidente.”

“P-pero bakit hindi mo ako hinanap?” may hinanakit na tong ko sa kanya

“Akala ko kasi ay galit ka sa akin at natatakot akong ipagtabuyan mo”

“Oh Dexter! Kailan man ay hindi kita kinamuhian…as a matter of fact I love you”

“And I love you, too”

“H-ha?”

Matagal ko siyang tinitigan sa kanyang mga mata. Nanaginip ba ako o ano?

Ngunit this time hindi lamang ito isang panaginip o ilusyon kung hindi katotohanan. Ah! Sa wakas napalaya ko rin sa aking dibdib ang lihim ko. Ang dating emptiness sa puso ko ay mapupunan na ng pagmamahal ng lalaking itinatangi ko.

Kung dati’y pangarap lang ang Lahat ngayon ay isa na itong katotohanan at hindi ko na hahayaang mawala pa siyang muli sa piling ko.

“Happy Mrs. Dexter Alonzo?”

Isang matamis na halik na puno ng pagmamahal ang tugon ko sa tanong niya.

Yes, I’m happy, very much…

--------------

Mariz

...Kung kayo talaga ang para sa isa't isa magkikita at magkikita kayong muli...

Kahit Ano...isip-isip!

Maraming tumatakbong bagay ngayon sa isip ko. Anything...kung anu-ano lang----

Una...Bakit kaya mataba si Santa Claus? Siguro puro Mani meat lang ang kinakain niya. Alaga siguro siya ni Mrs. Santa Claus sa pagmamahal...hmmm..Loving loving...ehem!

Pangalawa...Ano kaya kung magpakamatay ako? May iiyak kaya?--- Gusto ko sa burol ko lahat naka-pink para mukhang Valentines Day lang. Madami akong bulaklak noon for sure...bulakalak ng patay!

Pangatlo...Bakit ba sinabing malamig ang Christmas ng mga taong loveless...yung mga WALANG BOYFRIEND..tulad ko! Meron namang jacket diba?

Pang-apat...Ano bang pede kong gawin para maka-get over sa ugok na lalakeng iyon?

Panglima...Ayoko ng mag-isip...
                Ayoko ng mag-isip...
                Wag na sabing mag-isip...
----O sige hinde na last na to ...Ano pa ba?
      ----Wag na ngang mag-isip!


*Pahabol na isip-isip...
Santa kailan mo ba ko bibigyan ng True Love??

Sana Ngayong Pasko

Christmas is drawing near pero nakapagtataka na hindi ko ma-feel ang spirit ng kapaskuhan. Parang may kulang...parang may kulang na sana ngayong pasko ay mahanap ko...mabuo...ulet...

Sana Ngayong Pasko

Pasko na naman
Ngunit wala ka pa
Hanggang kailan kaya
Ako’y maghihintay sa iyo

Bakit ba naman
Kailangang lumisan pa
Ang tanging hangad ko lang
Ay makapiling ka

[chorus]
Sana ngayong Pasko
Ay maalala mo pa rin ako
Hinahanap-hanap pag-ibig mo
At kahit wala ka na
Nangangarap at umaasa pa rin ako
Muling makita ka
At makasama ka
Sa araw ng Pasko

Pasko na naman
Ngunit wala ka pa
Hanggang kailan kaya
Ako’y maghihintay sa iyo

Bakit ba naman
Kailangang lumisan pa
Ang tanging hangad ko lang
Ay makapiling ka

[repeat chorus 2x]

Sana ngayong Pasko…

Sana nga ngayong Pasko ay makasama ko siya ulet..the missing piece of my Heart!

LOVE LETTER

Do you know how much I hate you? of course you don’t, how are you suppose to know when you’re not even paying attention to me? gosh, bakit ba kasi kita namimiss? Bakit ba ako worried of what might have happened bad to you? to think that were over. Feeling ko kasi you always left me hanging. Yung tipong umaasa sa wala. You show me how important i am to you and then the next minute, you don’t even give a damn.

Alam mo ba… I always hope that you will change for the better. matanda ka na, you should at least be responsible. Ang playboy mo kasi eh kaya nga i keep on controlling my feeling for you, and yet here I am…hoping and praying to God na sana kahit isang sign lang that you still Love me ibigay nya.

I did’nt intend to fall for you so hard, but i just can’t help it. To think that you dont even know how much it hurts na marami akong kaagaw sayo. I keep asking myself, why is that that every guy i learned to love can’t be mine alone?! Palagi na lang na may kaagaw ako. katulad na lang ng sayo. bakit ba kasi playboy ka? God knows how much i regretted being one myself.. a “playgirl”. Hah! is this what they call KARMA?! gGrrHh… Naistress ako kakaisip sayo. I’ve done everything to forget about you even just for a minute but you keep on pestering my mind and i can’t help but think about you.

I miss your voice
I miss your laugh
i miss your thoughtfulness
i miss everything about you!!

--------------
Dahil hindi ko talaga alam kung anong nararamdaman ko...naisipan mag-sulat ng Love Letter ng Puso ko. Nakakahiya nga eh para akong teenager ng lagay na 'to.
Teka teenager pa rin naman ako ahh..di ba??Aiy ewan!

BITTER

I don't know pero feel ko talagang mag-emote ngayong mga sandaling itey. *hikab* inaantok pa yata ako...pero nakailang hikab na ko di ko pa rin alam...di ko pa rin alam ang dahilan ng kalungkutan ko...Siya ba talaga? ..Kaya nga pinost ko na sa Facebook para maraming makarelate[ewan ko lang kung may naka-relate..]baka sakaling maintindihan ko rin why I am feeling like this...eh ako rin naman ang dahilan ng lahat...kaya lang di ko talaga alam.

[facebook status] Mahirap pala magkaroon ng Angina Pectoris kung ang etiology eh lablyp...wa epek ang nitroglycerin...
11 hours ago · Comment · LikeUnlike · View Feedback (14)Hide Feedback (14)

• Dianne Nael likes this.
• Laiza Mae Abarquez Cantiveros: nyAhAhAha.....loLz
• poeticveela: ..totoo naman diba..pag ang chest pain mo sanhi ng pagkasawi sa lablyp mahirap gamutin...wah..bitter!! MY GOD!
• Laiza Mae Abarquez Cantiveros: nyAhHAhAhA..biTtr ngA..tSk3
• poeticveela: bitter talaga..nagaun ko lang na-feel..bigla ko syang namiss..as in to the highest level of kachorvahan..
• Laiza Mae Abarquez Cantiveros: wAhHHhh..yAn kAse..umiyAk kAh nAh lnG..tSk3..ilAbAs mO nAh feeL mO
• poeticveela: di ako maiyak eh..senti mode lang talaga..parang may nawawala...aiy drama..ano ba yan..wag ka nga ganyan..kasi..kasi..kasi naman eh..adik ko..hanap mo ko sibuyas baka sakaling maiyak akey..
• Laiza Mae Abarquez Cantiveros: nyAhhAA..loKA..mAs mAsArap umiyAk pAg hnD piniLit nOh...mAs mAsArp umiyAk kAse feeLng mO niLabas mO nAh lAhat ng sAma nG lOOb mO..
• poeticveela: ehh..bakit ganun di ako maiyak??abnormal yata 'tong Lacrimal gland ko eh..
• Laiza Mae Abarquez Cantiveros: nyAhHAhA...mAnhd kAh Atah..nyAHhAH
• poeticveela: ganun..may manhid bang namimiss siya??may manhid bang gusto siyang kausapin??may manhid bang gusto marinig tawa niya at boses niya??may manhid bang gusto marinig ang I Love You niya??
• Laiza Mae Abarquez Cantiveros: dAmi mO nAmAng tAnong...nAwindAng akO dUn Ah
• poeticveela: eh sa madaming tanong u-tak ko ngaun eh..ewan ko ba rin dito sa u-tak ko at heartlalouh ko ..pati ako nawiwindang.

Yung totoo?As in tell me the truth...manhid nga ba talaga ako?
O bitter lang talaga?
Alam mo yun...nung una okey lang sakin...pero habang tumatagal...

________tama na nga...saka na ko iiyak pag-feel na umiyak ng Lacrimal gland ko..pag feel na lumabas ng tears sa lacrimal duct ko...

Addicted

 

I gasp,

My soul whimper

I’m losing my grasp,

Horrified

I mused to stay close

Yet…you step back.

I stared at your handsome face

Your bright yellow eyes…

Almost cold pierce my soul…

Your red lips twitched a mocking grin.

I fought the urge to look away

Our gaze met…

Almost crushing my bruised heart

An obscure shadow dimmed your eyes,

It’s almost hard to fathom…

The hidden message beneath those smiles.

I shudder with a shrill,

Running through my spines

As you step again

Forward – so close

Almost touching my warm skin

Your lips brushed with mine

Letting me sip a taste of your wine

So sweet –

The kiss was soft…gentle

Yet, almost edgy

I can feel the passion

It’s burning inside.

I heard your velvet voice

Whispering in my ears

I try to hold back the tears

I held out my hand

Reaching you…

Again,

Again and again

With trembling remorse I called out your name,

But you’re gone…

Far away from me

Leaving me wounded,

Thirsty,

Hungry…

For your sweet wine still lingers in my lips.

I Love You...GOODBYE!

For the seventh time I sighed. I consciously look at my phone hoping that it will beep. I haven't slept properly for the past few days. Dark circles are around my eyes that can't deny the fact of depression I am feeling right now.

I can't let this case rest until solve but I don't have the courage to dial the number --- why...what...how...there's so many questions I needed to ask, yet I am afraid.

Fear engulf my heart like a hungry Lion growling wildly. I am hopeless, I know.

I heard my weak voice shrieked as light flooded across the room.

He is standing in front of the door. I can reflect pain in his eyes as he closely studied my hopeless condition.

He moaned, " What are you doing with yourself?"

" W-why do you care?"

" Because I---why---y-you look awful." I didn't realize I am crying 'till I felt the hot tears welling down my cheeks.

He step forward but abruptly stand back in front of the door. He looked away at me, maybe not wanting to see my tears.

" Why are you here?"

" I just wanted to say goodbye" He said still not looking at me

I whimper in silence. I couldn't stand this. It's killing me.

" But why? Why you have to say goodbye?"

"  You don't have to know. I just wanted to see you for the last time before it's all over."

" It hasn't have to end" I argued stubbornly

I looked at his face and saw the tears I didn't expected from him. In a split second I'm at his side wiping the tears I didn't know what is for.

" I love you...but I have to say goodbye" and for the last time he kissed me passionately.

I cried. What's the point? Saying I love you yet saying goodbye. Those line left a hole in my heart that is irreparable.

That was three months ago. That scene that keep on hunting my endless dreams. Now---now I am looking at his cold face. He is still beautiful despite all the pain he had suffered from his disease. I don't know. Being near him is still pointless no matter how near I am to him right now.

I can hear the endless cries around me as the soil slowly covers the casket wherein his body lies. But despite of all those noise I felt all alone. Empty.

He left me and that would be forever.

I sighed. I couldn't utter any parting words but the same words he said to me three months ago...

' I Love you...goodbye!'

Jailed

Broken dreams,

Losing hope-

I looked at the shattered mirror

There’s shadow in my face,

Blood n my hands...

I scream-

Terror flooded my heart

There’s no way to escape

Tears Fall from the sky

Trying to wash my mistake

I run-

Darkness blinded my eyes

Silence deafens my Ear.

I drop in my Knees,

My shoulder shaking with fear

I felt the cold bars

In my bare hands

I gasp...I close my eyes,

And say goodbye to the Light.

So Sick

I hate it when I'm sick. The feeling of nausea and dizziness plus the shivering and chilling factor. It made me think that at any moment I would soon die. Promise! I would never wish to be sick again. Just like what the song says:

"Be careful what you wish for cause you might just get it...you might just get it"

and I learned my lesson...never wish to be sick!

The Vampire of my Dreams

I have endlessly dreamed of this a thousand times before.

Across the corner of the street I can make out two figures standing face to face. One wearing fear and shock in his kind face. The other one seems not to notice the man’s emotion. He was standing there in front of him clutching fierce fully the man’s shoulders.

I managed a blink before I heard the agonizing scream of the man. Leaning in his neck is the other man in the black cloak. When he let go of the man’s shoulder it was just a lifeless body, its eyes wide opened. I fought the urge to let out a scream.

I clutch my chest and step backward. I heard the echo of my footsteps. The hooded figure looked at my way. My mouth dropped open when I caught sight of his crimson red eyes under the faint light of the lamp post.

He slowly glides my way not tearing his gaze away from me. I started to panic when he gets nearer and nearer. I closed my eyes. It flew open when I felt his cold hand caressing my cheeks. I sigh – why it feels so good?

The horror that flooded my heart moments ago was replaced by an unexplained feeling. I closely studied his beautiful face. His dark crimson red eyes are filled with lust…hunger. He has a pale skin, white as a snow that glistened under the light. He has those perfectly shaped red lips that matched his handsome face crowned with long blond hair. It’s just like looking at a Greek God that descends from the Heavens above. Without noticing it I found myself touching his cold smooth face with his eyes closed. It took me a full minute to realize his shoulders are not moving…he’s not breathing or he’s trying not to.

I shriek when a soft growl escaped his throat.

His eyes flew open. ‘I’m sorry’ I heard his dark velvet voice said. When I didn’t utter a response he nestled me into his cold arms. I shivered and just like thousands of times before I would wake up.

However, this time I didn’t wake up. No clock alarmed at my side. I heard no shouting from my mom downstairs asking me to hurry up.

I closed my eyes hard as I could, but when I opened it I’m still looking at his beautiful ashen face. I gasp when he lowered his lips to mine. I moaned as millions of burning sensation lingers to every part of my body and soul reaching my heart. He looked at me passionately…desire burning in his eyes. He cradled my nape with his big hands exposing my neck.

He opened his mouth that exposed two sharp fangs. I open my mouth but no sound came out of it. He started to lean at my neck, but when I was just about to give in he let go of me.

‘Run’ he commanded in a low voice without even looking at me. Hurt is in his eyes…he is THIRSTY.

I hesitated but he pushed me. I started to run endlessly. I can hear his growl behind me.

Panting, I stop running when my feet started to ache. I looked back and I didn’t see him anymore, but I can hear the distant echo of his confession…

‘I love you! Don’t ever come back here. I don’t want to hurt you. Please, never dream of me again. Never fall under my illusion again.’

Right then I started to cry…my heart aching. I started to run back but when I was just a heartbeat away from him my alarm clock startled me and forces my consciousness to wake up.

Sanity

I’m just an illusion trap in this world. I breathed in the memory of the girl lost in the vortex of the unknown. On her memories I remember the longing and the feeling of being lost. I remember his deep sea green eyes. That color that bind her in the deepest room of her mind that I now owned.

I woke up as a start feeling nauseated. In my blurred vision I can see anxious faces waiting…for what I would become. A sudden feeling of claustrophobia engulf me as those unfamiliar faces leaned over and attack me with different questions each of which I don’t know how to respond.

Comprehension doesn’t seem to work fast in this mind. I fought the urge to whimper and beg for another world. I closed my eyes and let them read the mixed feeling of irritation and anxiousness in my face. It took me a minute or so to breath comfortably again as the sudden silence deafens my ears.

i heard a sob in the far corner of my head.

Who are you?

Me? I don’t know who I am

You don’t have any place in this world, get out of my head

I can’t…that’s impossible

No…please! I need to get back to him. His waiting for me

Who is he?

It’s none of your business!

I can remember him

You don’t know him. Please let me through. Set me free, I beg you.

No..no..no…

My breathing started to get shallow. I can feel the throbbing of my head. A monitor close by started to beep. I can feel the panic of the people around me. I briskly let my heavy lid close.

Darkness…

Silence…

I’m in the vortex again. Coldness and emptiness embraced me. Just when I started to cry a warm hand touched my face. I can feel the palpitation of my heart…beating wildly.

Oh! I gasp when she get pass through me and when I open my eyes I’m looking at his deep sea green eyes…With a sob I started to understand…

I’m just an illusion. I’m her insanity when he left her heart wounded.

GriEf!!

I cant remember ever feeling so fragile
this heart of mine weep inside
I consciously watch their vicious smiles
as i stumble and fall along the line

the surge of emotion overwhelm me.

As twilight approach i plead
in my heart dawn does not exist
in pain...agony prevail!

Then a Devil swiftly walk my way,
He damningly intense my agony
Yet, as i whimper in silence
He nestle me in his arms
with kisses he dried my tears
Oh, hell! How my heart melts!
But when i open my eyes...his gone.
I vaguely remember his face
But the piercing feeling remains,
My heart race as I remember.

Twilight crept and i wait
for him to cross my way again
Till that time comes
My agony is at edge
Waiting for my demonic angel to erase it.

where am I now?

When they told me that i will transfer to a new school--shame on me, but--i really cried hard..as in..i don't actually know why i weep at that time. Maybe because i don't want to leave important things behind..my friends, my classmates, my school, the people who had believe in me and stay with me when i'm feeling lost..Or maybe it is because i am afraid.. Afraid to start a new life and to meet new people..to be in an unknown WORLD.

And true as it is..the first two weeks of my life in OLIVAREZ COLLEGE and at a new HOME had been full of fear..I am afraid to be rejected by the new society i had been force to fit in. I am afraid of what they had to say about me. Afraid that i couldn't blend in with the flow.

But what would happen to my life if i'll just continue to sulk? So, i tried to overcome my fear and interact with the people around me.

I guess i had been wrong after i realized that i didn't need to be afraid because that's just how life should be... We need to move on. We need to meet new people in order for us to bloom and be matured. In order for us to learn.

But the people that I had left behind wouldn't be buried in the past. They would always be a part of my life and who I am.

So where Am I right now?

..in my new WorLD along with the memories of my life in CMCC..

[i miss my friends, i miss ferryzz whill, i miss my professors, and i miss CMCC]